Numb, Empty Eyes

You can make me feel so high, I would die if I fell

and you can make me feel so low like I'm swimming in hell

but when the phone finally rings and you are clear as crystal

all I can feel inside now is like a stone cold pistol.

There was once when one and one always made two 

but when I look around now, I no longer see you.

And I don't even know how I should feel

cause being alone still seems so unreal. 

Well, I know I'm gonna make it, I'm too stubborn otherwise

but when you look at me, you may find empty eyes,

being numb can sometimes have its benefits

cause sometimes there's no other way of keepin' my wits.

But it makes it kinda tough to ever love again

Don't wanna be run over by a reality train

To think all is fine and dandy, and life is all grand

only to find out I had my head stuck in the sand.

Well I think I still have sand grains stuck in my eyes

cause I personally thought that I was a pretty good prize

held you up on the pedestal of a living queen

made lovin' you part of my daily routine.

Guess its time to learn a whole new way of livin'

cause I still got lots of love that really worth givin'

so if you find that you really want to step aside

I'll make the hurting of the world my new lovin' bride. 

Our Queen, Our Home, Our Mother Earth

Father God and Mother Earth

if you had known before our birth

that we would rape and plunder our own Earth Mother

kill and steal for greed, our sisters and brothers,

Would you have created us anyway

or waited for just one more day

and maybe considered that mankind

would be arrogant, overbearing, not intertwined.

Set apart from the rest of your creation

but consider nature their own pissing station.

Do you groan now and shake your head

thinking maybe Mother would prosper if only we were dead?

Do you regret when you made us from the clay

do we disappoint because we disobey?

Do you discuss among yourselves how we learned to hate

make war, make signs, instead of trying to relate.

Have you noticed that its easier for us to feel anger

than compassion when we see our Mother in danger?

Just what kind of selfish children have we become

what kind of hateful, hurtful, raping scum?

But as always, there is good among the bad

the children you are proud and happy you had

and for them you keep the population alive

and give them a chance to make peace revive.

Their voices quiet and scattered until one day

they find each other and start to pray

for guidance and protection in protecting for all we are worth

our Queen, our Home, our Mother Earth.

What Does it Take?

Recently, it seems that more and more people in the world of the Christian Right are either coming out gracefully as homosexuals or being outed by their actions. Two prominent contemporary Christian artists, Jennifer Knapp and Ray Boltz both come to mind as those who have announced their sexual orientation in the media. They both have said that they can both trace their homosexuality from a young age and that they have made peace with their Maker regarding this. 

Others within the Christian right have been outed by their actions and most were quickly rejected by their church. Among these include Lonnie Frisbee, Roy Clements, Ted Haggard, Paul Crouch, Paul Barnes, and Lonnie Latham. Most prominently in this company are John Paulk, (former leader/chairman of Focus on the Family's Love Won Out conference and Exodus International North America), as well as George Rekers, (founding member of the Family Research Council and board member of the National Association for Research & Therapy of Homosexuality). It is fair to say that all these men came out of the closet kicking and screaming and many swear to this day that this is untrue although evidence suggests differently. 

I include this list to say this....How many "outings" does it take before the Christian Right considers the possibility that MAYBE, just MAYBE people are born gay? 

Another list that if compiled would be miles long and much more humbling, is the number of gay's who have finally taken their own lives after being tormented, judged, and rejected. There is a reason that the suicide rates among our young gay population is significantly higher. Research shows that as many as 30 percent of the completed suicides among our youth each year is completed by a gay or lesbian. That number does not include attempted suicides. Gay youth are 2 to 3 times more likely to attempt suicide and completed suicide is the number one reason for death among this group.

So again I ask....How many gays and lesbians must take their own lives out of desperation and brokenness as a result of the rejection our society brings down upon them before we will consider the possibility that homosexuals are simply born that way?

I am astounded at the thinking among the Christian Right. They will take the word of a self-proclaimed healer who touches a "sick" individual on the head knocking them to the ground to believe that he is anointed by God to heal, but will not accept the clear evidence that is before them. They would rather hundreds upon hundreds of homosexuals die by their own hand than to consider the possibility that they have misinterpreted scripture. 

So one last time I ask and I hope someone out there will answer me....

"What does it take?"

Hypocrisy and the Holiness Code

A few years ago, in response to a conservative talk show host's condemnation of homosexuality using the holiness code that is Leviticus 18, an individual wrote the following letter. Although humorous, it makes it clear how hypocritical it is to pick and choose what laws you are going to follow. If you follow one, you must follow them all.

Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I have learned a great deal from your show, and try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be abomination. End of debate.

I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some of the other specific laws and how to follow them.
 
1. When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing smell for the Lord — Leviticus 1:9. The problem is my neighbors. They claim the odour is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?

2. I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?

3. I know that I am not allowed to have contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanliness — Leviticus 15:19-24. The problem is, how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offence.

4. Leviticus 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighbouring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?

5. I have a neighbour who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states she should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill her myself?

6. A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish and molluscs (shrimp, lobster, scallops, mussels, oysters, etc) is an abomination — Leviticus 11:10, it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree. Can you settle this?

7. Leviticus 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here?

8. Most of my male friends get their hair cut, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by the bible, in Leviticus 19:27. How should they die?

9. I know from Leviticus 11:6-9 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves? If I have played football in the past, must my hands be amputated?

10. My uncle has a farm. He violates Leviticus 19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of threads (cotton and polyester blend). He also tends to curse a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town to stone them? — Leviticus 24:10-16. Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? Leviticus 20:14

I know you have studied these things extensively, so I am confident you can help. Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and unchanging.

Your devoted fan, Jim

TO: "Lord Save us from your Followers" I say "AMEN"

 

Recently, I had the opportunity to view the documentary "Lord Save Us from your Followers". It was created and produced by an evangelical christian. He wanted the christian community to be able to see themselves from the secular point of view. 

One of the most fascinating moments was when he conducted an experiment in the form of a game show similar to Family Feud. On one side was a group of evangelical/conservative Christians, and on the other a group of non-Christians/secularists. In order to win, each group must be able to think like the other group. What he found out with four separate families/groups, was that the secular group could think like a Christian, but the Christians could not think like a secularist. In other words, the Christians had little ability to move outside their own world and glimpse into the perspectives of people of other faiths or no faith at all. 

That explains a lot. I ask myself all the time how any Christian could intentionally hurt another and claim that they are in the right based upon their bible. My perspective of that is from the point of view of a homosexual who has been driven to attempt suicide by the condemnation of the church. Unfortunately, this is an all too common perspective. I like to tell myself that if Christians knew how many homosexuals they had driven to take their own lives by trying to "save" them, they would change their ways and repent. However, I'm not holding my breath. Until they can relearn the ability of empathy instead of right-fighting, it will never stop. 

Another noticeable lesson from the documentary is that America see's God in a much more favorable light than they see his followers. Thanks to the radical right and many evangelical Christians, the church is often considered a place of judgment and condemnation, of hate and snobbishness. The word "God" on the other hand, brings to mind words like "love".  

I find this terribly sad. It is in fact, one of the reasons if I am asked if I am a Christian, I will answer "no". I know that if my instinct, having grown up in the church and have spent 8 years as a pastor's wife, automatically have nothing but negative thoughts when the word is mentioned, than how much more so those who have not seen any of the good things of God? "Christian" has become a dirty word, and "church" a scary place. I avoid any business that claims to be "Christian" oriented because I have learned to expect just the opposite of  "Christ-like". 

The good thing is, this trend is starting to change. This documentary is proof of that. There are Christians who are capable of thinking outside the box, of showing empathy. The traditional church continues to fight this change, however, progressive churches are pressing forward. I even see it happening here in the Bible Belt, which surprises me the most.

It is terribly difficult for me not to scream to the religious right  "STOP scaring people away from God!!"

I suppose it is one of my greatest frustrations. It defies common sense to try to bring people to a God who hates them for who they are, yet that is the message that prevails. 

But it is people like the gentleman who made this documentary and the progressive Christians who show that one must live the love of God, that will change this message. I look forward to that day and I hope to be a part of it.

Karma Stings the Evil

They say Karma is a bitch

and revenge is the Lord's

ain't got no problem with that

'cause they're both in one accord.

Now I don't mean to be cruel

it ain't what I'm all about

but when Karma stings the evil

I wanna stand up and shout.

Gotta admit its mighty nice

when the haters feel the hate

reap the fruit of their labor

and with destiny have their date.

You will sow what you reap

in those words make no mistake

sow love and it will return

but beware in sowin' hate.

God is a Big Boy and can take care of Himself

There is a Christian song that reads "there's room at the cross for you,...though many may come, there is still room for one, there's room at the cross for you."

As wonderful and open as the author intended it, the point of Christianity is that you MUST come to the cross in order to be allowed Heaven. Meaning that there are millions upon millions of people of other religions and faiths who, because of this, must be doomed to hell. I have a real problem believing God is like that. 

Today, Franklin Graham, minister, and son of Billy Graham, one of the greatest men of faith to have ever lived (in my humble opinion), really drew a line between Christianity and other faiths. He has stated in the past that Islam is an evil religion and for that was "dis-invited" from a National Day of Prayer event. Today, Graham told Newsmax,   

"We certainly love the Muslim people. But that is not the faith of this country. And that is not the religion that built this nation. The people of the Christian faith and the Jewish faith are the ones who built America, and it is not Islam."

He also seriously disrespected Hinduism, stating,

   

"No elephant with 100 arms can do anything for me. None of their 9,000 gods is going to lead me to salvation. We are fooling ourselves if we think we can have some big kumbaya service and all hold hands and it's all going to get better in this world. It's not going to get better."

Is he serious? First the original religion of this country was the one practiced by the Native Americans. That only changed when the white "Christians" sailed the ocean blue and whipped out the native population. The founding fathers' intention was to establish a country where there was absolutely NO government establishment of religion because they were tired of being ordered what they should believe.

Secondly, insulting other religions is not the way to win people to your own faith. I'm sorry, but the story of Jonah surviving 3 days inside the gastric juices of a whale at the whim of a bully God is just as ridiculous as believing in a God symbolized by an "elephant with 100 arms". It is a symbol, a parable, an example. It is man's attempt to understand the workings of a God whose essence is far beyond what we can comprehend. 

It is BECAUSE God is so big and so amazing that I have a hard time believing that he confines "himself" to ONE faith. The only proof most faiths have that they are the only way to Heaven, is because they say they are. The same can be said of Christianity. The accepted books of the Bible were determined by men through the centuries. Even the great Martin Luther attempted to change the accepted books by removing Hebrews, James, Jude and Revelation. The issue of Jesus' divinity was up for debate until the first Council of Nicea when it was put up to a VOTE (a vote!) whether or not Jesus was God's literal son or a figurative son as the other "sons of God" mentioned in scripture. It was not even considered by many early Christians to even think of Jesus as anything other than a great prophet. 

It is amazing to me to think that Jesus, who, (as we were taught) knew he was the Son of God, would not take the time to write down his own Gospel. Why be so cryptic? Why do we have to guess which book is divinely inspired and which is not? Why are the gospels as found in the Dead Sea Scrolls and the Nag Hammadi Library not included? Is it because they do not assume that Jesus was God made flesh?

With all this said, I am not an enemy of God, nor am I an atheist. Far from it. I absolutely believe there is a God. However, I refuse to limit God and demand that "he" only speak to me. I will not tell "him" who he is allowed to speak to or speak through. I will not act like a spoiled child who demands that only Daddy love me, and not my brothers and sisters. I will let God be God. I will leave it up to him. I will trust him to lead people to him in his way and in his time. Just as I trust my human father and mother to make good decisions in relation to me, so too, do I trust him. I do not have to be his defender. 

He is a big God, and I will respect that.